5.10.2015

Wetlands (Feuchtgebiete)

I've been on MC over the long weekend, and during that made the time to watch two German films. There is after all, no better way to learn a new language than to watch one in its native tongue.
One of them was the controversial Wetlands (or Feuchtgebiete - did I spell that right?), and I'm not going to bother discussing the film or it's supposed NSFW elements. Oh it was definitely quite provocative at a few points, but I can't say I did not find some scenes  - getting eaten out by a hot German boy between her legs, masturbating with veggies in her bathtub or the shaving scene - erotic. Oh how I fantasize for the first one (which actually has happened before hehhehhehhhehhhehheheh hot German included).
Anyway, the appeal the movie surprisingly had on me was Helen's amazing wardrobe!  


Helen actually spends most of the movie in hospital scrubs which is why this is surprising. But the few scenes we had of her in 'normal' clothes were so inspiring! Above: denim cutoffs and this amazingly sexy slashed Bad religion tee cut just so, to show off side boob. Love it! The skateboard only adds to the cool factor. 

My absolute favourite, and the one I am driven to emulate TOMORROW, is the one near the beginning right after she *SPOILER* accidentally cuts her ass. Ok I am not a very sexually deviant person. However the scene of her in that short pleated skirt riding around on her skateboard with blood dripping down her thighs was...kind of erotic. I literally want to go and get myself a pleated skirt, a skateboard and ride around town in a similar outfit - it's just so understatedly sexy. We can do without blood, obviously.
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5.08.2015

State

Sometimes I don't know whether I should miss you or forget about you. My mind tells me the latter, but my heart says the former. Every single time I am left alone with my thoughts - in bed, in the bath, by the pool, eating - my mind drifts towards thoughts of you. They say actions speak louder than words and that's all I think of - your actions when we were together. They leave me feeling happy for a while and then I am sad. Heart wrenching, uncontrollable tears.
The saying goes, "the best way to get over someone is to get under another". Believe me this is ill advice. It will only leave your body satisfied but you in a mess crying in the toilet trying to stifle your sobs so the other person can't hear you. It's kind of hard to explain to someone: that they're a rebound and you wanted to try and fuck the pain away but it didn't work so thanks very much I know am crying but let's get it on again now.
The gist of this post is: I miss him (even though I shouldn't), you cannot fuck the pain away and the heart will always want what it wants. Like Ben says, "attraction is not a choice".

I miss him. Ich vermisse dich.
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